DWELL DEEP

$1.89 basil

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Sat, 21 Jun 2008 01:38:00 +0000

manhattan isn't playing around... you want basil, we GOT BASIL!

i guess it's for all that italian food. i mean, the roots are still attached. i'm thinking i could probably stick it in some soil and keep growing it.

but instead i'm going to make a caprese salad. :)

trying to make art again

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 05 May 2008 01:39:00 +0000

last weekend was purge weekend in preparation for our upcoming move. as i was cleaning out my craft closet, i realized i'd had my gocco for almost 5 months and only made 2 prints with it.

so i gathered up some inspiration and set to work. then i ruined two screens and got to a dead end. i will try again tomorrow. i had a feeling it might backfire on me, but the fear of making a mistake or failing is what was holding me back anyway, so i guess i just need to press through it. i want to make more art again. i hate that my walls aren't covered in paintings and drawings anymore. i think i just need a little structure for myself, or a theme to investigate.

i'm going to do a series on death. the image above that i'm working on has ghost people behind the main character... and i like the direction of that. we'll see where it heads.

cheers!
sam

we finally know...

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 23:27:00 +0000

we're headed to the big apple!

twitter and my utter lack of news

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 01:31:00 +0000

so i put a twitter updater on the left side of the page. it's sort of a micro-blogging thing... it's a little easier for me to post what i'm up to with it than to feel the need to compose a well-written witty entry for this main page part. check it out to see my daily commentaries on life. also, not that witty, but at least you'll feel that you're in the loop.

also, russ and i are in that impossible wait stage that happens in life. i have no news. also, i have made no art. i have gone almost primal in my online t.v. watching. it started with the week russ was finishing his thesis (btw he defended and amazed a whole room of people with his mad math skills... no revisions even!)... i was bored and started watching the office on netflix streaming. i have now seen all of them. all four seasons. then this past weekend i took some vacation days and started watching 30 rock because everyone had said it was great and i have a secret admiration for tina fey. i'm pretty sure my brain has become mush. also, my conversational vernacular has been replaced with television quotes. my sense of what is funny has been shaped by nbc.

how frightening.

-sam

telling secrets...

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 02:33:00 +0000

i'm still around. just in case you're wondering. it's just been insanely busy these past few weeks and i haven't had time to sit and write on here. i really don't have time now, as i should be getting to bed.

i'll try to write again soon with more news. soon meaning this week.

-s.e.w.

shop update

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 00:50:00 +0000

the bird print has been added to the shop. yay!

weekly update no. 3

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 01:45:00 +0000

this is week 3, i'm going to ignore the fact that i never got around to posting last weekend.

the internet "fasting" is still going well. it's been entertaining to try and explain it to people around me. they usually end up looking at me as though i've contracted some sort of disease, but then they clearly haven't understood the level of internet-time-wasting i was engaged in prior to the fast.

i've loved doing daily yoga. i've also done a bit of sewing and print-making. i posted some of my newest projects on my flickr. we had some seat cushions at our dining table that were seriously gross. they were off-white and had more than one stain on each side. i contemplated making whole new cushions by cutting out the foam and starting from scratch, but then as i planned it out i realized part of what i hated about those ikea cushions was that they weren't washable. so instead, i made slip-cover type envelopes for the cushions. that way, if i spill an entire mug of chai all over them (not that i would EVER do that...) i can pop them in the wash.

i started teaching a sewing class on every third weekend and have been reminded of how much i love teaching. it is so fun to be able to transfer knowledge and watch someone pass from trepidation to confidence at any given skill. russ and i have agreed that when we produce some minions, i'll teach sewing, knitting and art classes out of our house. that way i can stay home and have time to be that pretentious hippie mom i always dream of being... you know the one who sews all her children's clothes and grows her own veggies. but sans dreadlocks.

i'm feeling a bit under the weather at the moment, but am hoping i recover quickly. i can't miss any work this week and hate being less than 100%.

i guess that's all the news i have for now.
hope everyone's had a great weekend!
cheers,
sam

weekly update no. 1

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 03:03:00 +0000

picture: russ rolling cord. we recorded a few songs tonight, which was really fun. we don't have space to leave the stuff out all the time, so russ cleaned up after.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

this week went really well. i found the fasting from the internet to be really healthy for me. i didn't necessarily make a lot of art this past week, but i felt better about myself and more emotionally honest.

doing the yoga daily was refreshing and i actually felt like time was passing at a reasonable pace, rather than the blur it had become. i was able to breathe. to hear myself think. to be inspired.

and i baked! i didn't take pictures, but i made chocolate chip banana bread this week, which was so yummy! and peach cobbler last night. i feel like myself again. i hadn't cooked with pleasure in months.

i also listened to two podcasts this week that were really enlightening and inspiring to me:

krista tippett talking to rachel naomi remen

and

grace and peace - a talk by rob bell

both of these targeted issues of identity and purpose, things with which i often struggle. they were both encouraging and both brought a sense of clarity. so i thought i'd share. they're really both worth listening to.

i also posted some new pictures online. i made a new painting recently that i hadn't photographed, and some around the house shots too.

hope everyone's well. i'll be back next weekend!
namaste,
sam

for my own good....

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 14 Jan 2008 03:38:00 +0000

my husband and i got rid of our tv when we moved from texas a few years ago and were really happy with our choice. we had more time for our hobbies (music and art/crafts) and more time with each other.

however, as my husband has been working on grad school so much lately, i've found that i spend more and more time on the internet during the week. i come home and he is spread out on our sofa with his laptop, so i sit in the only available seat at my drafting table, where my computer is.

then i become some sort of internet zombie. i've realized that i spend at least an hour or two every day looking at blogs, shopping websites, flickr, facebook, the news, and other random sites i end up at.

at the same time, i have felt a decrease in the amount and quality of time i spend on reading, making art and meditating/praying. after losing my dad last september, i've had a hard time dealing with my emotions. i spend a greater part of every week suppressing my feelings and slipping into an ever-deepening numbness that has made me feel isolated and lonely. i haven't struggled with depression in this way in a long time.

so... this weekend, after a refreshing cry and long talk with russ, i've decided to try some changes in my schedule.

first is to commit to doing a 30 minute yoga and 30 minute devotional/bible/praying time every day when i get home from work.

second is to move my computer from my desk to a small side table and unplug it. i will only be turning it on during the weekends. the hope is that through this discipline i will find more time to grieve and let my emotions surface and also get in touch with the things i love doing and have missed in the past few months, like reading, drawing, sewing, etc.

as a result, i will only be checking email on the weekends, so please know that if you have a more pressing need, you should probably call my cell phone or try emailing russ. i will also be processing all my etsy sales on the weekends, which will slow it down a bit, but hopefully will mean that i am actually making more things to sell, so i think it is a good thing in the end.

i will also try to post on this blog on the weekends, with more pictures of what i'm making and more of my writings and maybe some of the songs russ and i have written, if we can figure out how to stream them. :)

next week i'll post pics of the new living room and my desk.

cheers to all of you! see you next weekend!
sam

merry christmas and gocco!

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 03:34:00 +0000

so i posted some christmas pics over on flickr (link) for everyone to see. russ and i had christmas alone this year and i made gingerbread, pot roast with herb mashed potatoes and sour cream apple pie... all from scratch. i miss cooking. i've gotten so busy lately i hadn't been trying new things, but today reminded me how much fun it is.

so i only asked for one thing this year: gocco. today i made my first prints, an edition of 30 (in the shop). part of the girl's arm didn't come out all the way, but i'm pretty happy with them. i really love the clean-up process, which is pretty much non-existent thanks to the tidy gocco set up.

i'm hoping that this screen printer will help me distribute more art in an accessible way, while allowing me to stockpile originals for a show sometime in the future.

that said, please PLEASE let me know if there are any daily drawings or other drawings of mine that you'd like to see in print form....

merry christmas all!
sam

tagged: 5 things you may not know about me

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Tue, 18 Dec 2007 02:09:00 +0000

sarah (http://hi--howareyou.blogspot.com/) tagged me for this, so here goes!

1. i don't own a t.v. i haven't had one in a few years and although i waste a good amount of time online, i enjoy not having it staring at me when i sit on my couch.

2. i don't like coffee. can't stand it really, unless i mix it with half water. i will always be a tea girl.

3. i am a slightly-more-intense-than-average-harry-potter-fan. i don't dress up, but i do read fan websites regularly and read the books through about once a year. i didn't even get into them until just after the 6th book came out and haven't been able to put them down since. i don't think i've written about it too much on here, although i think i posted a couple of times about it.

4. i have a "monica" closet. monica geller on friends, who is a total neat freak, has this one closet that is completely chaotic. (see pic above) i have a closet like this. no matter how many times i clean it out, it always remains dangerously close to taking out your eye if you open the door.

5. i don't "sketch" drawings out before i draw them. sometimes i sketch paintings. i just always found that sketching and working out the idea was the fun part and re-doing it all seemed boring to me. i have since learned that sometimes you really should sketch, but still on my little drawings and for my daily drawings, i always just shoot from the hip with my black pen. it's more fun for me to figure out how to make the mistakes look intentional than to trace pencil lines.

okay. so i also don't have a ton of friends doing this blog thing, so i tag michelle at freeandliving.

love to you all!
sam

little poem

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 01:46:00 +0000

the tinkling of glasses
the merriment of a group of friends
i hear it from afar
it cannot reach me
i am within.

site redesign

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 02:46:00 +0000

it was time for a fresh face. i'm not sure how long i will love the sunshine yellow, but for now it makes me happy.

i'm still ironing out some kinks with the blog layout. i'd like it to look a little more integrated with the site, but it's getting there.

also, i updated my ETSY shop (see the link on the left sidebar) with some plush. it's just in time for the holidays!

cheers!
sam

p.s.

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 16:23:00 +0000

so i thought i should address the obnoxious failure that was my "daily posting", which, as you might notice, did not happen.

there are a few reasons (excuses) for this.

first, i mostly write on here to share my arts and crafts or if i have something really important to say, which honestly rarely happens on a daily basis. i get really insecure and anxious when i feel forced to write something and feel as though i have nothing to say. i cannot tell you how many times i composed posts and deleted them because they were just pointless blabbering.

second, i have been so busy with life and holidays and work and trying to keep the laundry done and the dishes clean that i haven't been making daily art.

so there. i feel better having at least apologized for the disparaging lack of posts in november, but feel confident that i might be posting more in december as things are slowing down a bit at work and with russell's school.

love to you all!
sam

kraftworks

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 16:21:00 +0000

so i did pretty well at the craft fair yesterday. i love going just because i meet so many cool people and because people get excited about handmade arts and crafts.

i was so busy every night this week sewing and making merchandise to sell. the things that didn't go will be put up on etsy later tonight, so if you need to do some holiday shopping (hint hint!)....

now i'm a little sleepy, but excited that i get to eat the chocolate out of my advent calendar because it's finally december! (thanks ash!)

-sam

the last time i saw him.

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 02:13:00 +0000

i don't know what possessed me to pull out my camera at that moment, just before he drove off to go to lowe's, but i did. (i cropped myself out of this picture). i think that is the thing i regret most... not going with him to lowe's that day. he invited us, he was going to look for a/c units for the laundromat, but i didn't feel like going, just wanted to rest up... it was the only vacation time i was taking until after august, and i was being a prat. it was so selfish of me. it would only have been a few hours.

although we did tile some floor with him last christmas. that was the funny thing about my dad. he never just "hung out".... if you wanted to spend time with him, you had to go and do something with him.... like work on the car, fix a washing machine, or at the very least, drive somewhere together to look for a "part".

sometimes i wished i was a boy and could have taken more interest in all the wonderful world of gadgetry that was his, and his only, expert domain. i walked a strange line between being the product of two people later on in life who had wanted very much to give me a life of privilege and being outright spoiled and selfish.

there are so many things i would like to say to my dad, but the funny part is, i know without a doubt that it was impossible to have the kind of conversations i imagine in my head. he hated talking about feelings and emotions.... and wouldn't dwell on discussions about too much of the past. he came from a world where you didn't share that kind of stuff out loud, i came from a world where you share everything without any social filter.

it's hard to write about it, but at some level it feels good to do it.
i miss him terribly, it is still so unreal that he's gone.

-sam

woman in the grocery store

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Tue, 06 Nov 2007 01:29:00 +0000

so i'm in line at the checkout, my antibiotic-free-range-fed-chicken sausage and veggie booty on the conveyor belt thingy, and i'm looking at the shelves of gum and chocolate yumminess that sit at every register.

ooh! i see fruit leathers on the bottom shelf are on sale. (we love throwing these in our bags for snacks). i crouch down and start grabbing some good flavors and .... out of nowhere....

this woman comes flying up behind me and, almost stepping on me, declares that she needs to pay for her ice cream bar, waving the box at me with one hand, the other of which is holding the afore-mentioned ice cream bar, unwrapped and half eaten.

i straighten up slowly and looking at her with only the mildest expression of shock at being addressed in this way, politely point to my things on the belt and explain that i am actually next in line to check out. she looked shocked. as if i routinely shop for groceries in the check out line... so silly of me to get in the way! or as if i was holding up a line somehow...(the woman in front of me was still busy signing her credit card on the screen).... or if i had a cart full of groceries... but i only had 5-6 items, including the fruit leathers!

anyhow... i laughed about it all the way to my car.

no. 4

noreply@blogger.com (sam) — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 00:07:00 +0000

no. 4
Originally uploaded by dwelldeep

this one is about stopping all the spinning wheels and cogs and being still. then letting all the feelings wash over me. all of them.

the pain
loss
bitterness
resentment
sorrow
depression
hope
desire to see revenge
loneliness
snippets of memories
love

it is a kind of cleansing process. forcing myself to be honest. to be real. to assess where my faith lies. is it in myself? or in something? or someone? to let go of what i cannot control. to surrender what i ought not control. to seek peace. forgiveness. wholeness.

feist

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 19:20:00 +0000

do you have a feist album?

go get one now. oh and the videos (most on youtube) are also good.

:) sam

an unsociable and taciturn disposition

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Sat, 03 Nov 2007 18:16:00 +0000

i have one. lately i have desired to be mostly alone and not with people. i feel drained and want to sit around and write or draw. i wonder how long this will last.

no. 3

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 23:23:00 +0000

this one is a birthday gift for a friend whose line of work involves connecting with oppressed groups of people and bringing peace and growth to them...

today was really hard on my mom. we spent a long time on the phone talking about my dad and how strange it is that he's gone. i realized that i've been spending most of my time pretending it didn't happen.

on a lighter note, i got some method holiday hand soap today. it smells like christmas trees. go get some.

love to all!
sam

abbreviated thoughts...

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 00:09:00 +0000

so i'm trying to do this NaBloPoMo thing where i post every day for a month. no cheating. we'll see. i'm not actually sure i have all that much to say on a regular basis.

i will share a quote i jotted down while watching "the painted veil" with russ the other night:

"these men are like animals. they have no vision, only hunger and strength."

i thought that was a powerful statement.

that's all for now.
cheers!
sam

no. 2

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 01:54:00 +0000

i'm still here.
(sheepish smile)

i've been a little swamped and a little too numb lately. i'm realizing again that the longer i wait to make art, the harder it is to do (instead, i'll just clean my house, or sew another skirt, or blah blah blah....). it feels good to process emotions this way.... i forget that too easily.

however, in my defense, the paper process is a little more daunting to me.... and a LOT more messy, which brings me to a major frustration of our living space right now: that my computer sits on my art table and i hate it being messy when i want to be on the computer or doing my design projects. we also use my computer as the entertainment resource for tv shows and movies, so having little pieces of paper and glue and knives lying around just makes it feel crazy...and a little dangerous.

so yeah. in other news... i'm listening to harry potter on cds at work. it's helping all the holiday display prep to be little easier as i can get lost in the story. i'm shocked at how quickly time is passing. i knew it would be like this, but i can't believe it's already halloween and then it will be thanksgiving so fast and then christmas again already. weird.

russ is starting to hunt for jobs, so we could be re-locating again soon. we want to road trip to our next destination... because it would be fun and because i don't trust my plants to a relocation company. i'll try to take garden pics again when the rain stops. i've gotten so many more plants, it looks like a rainforest outside our front door. :) i may not luck into such a temperate climate the next go around.

cheers everyone! and i hope to be posting more regularly again. i had fun with this collage, i'll try to ride the motivational feelings.

-sam

no. 1

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Fri, 12 Oct 2007 01:17:00 +0000

so the collage series begins. i probably won't be doing one every day... but maybe a few per week until i get to 100 again. this should be an interesting experiment for me, as i will be working with colors (infinitely more possibilities!).

i'm going to try and get some vintage magazines and picture books (donations welcome!) for more interesting scraps... for now i'm working with origami paper and solids from the art store.

i've been asking those big life questions again lately... like am i really happy with what i'm doing? is my notion of happiness realistic? what do i really want to be doing with my life? what is in the way of that?

and why do i spend sooooo much time "piddling" (our family term for time-wasting) online?

i need a little more self-discipline in my life... to stay on the track that aligns with my dreams and my priorities. sometimes it is so much easier to drift into numbness and just tune it all out.

here's to a friday full of clarity and focus!
sam

NYC

noreply@blogger.com (s. e. wedelich) — Wed, 10 Oct 2007 22:44:00 +0000

we went to new york this weekend and had a lot of fun in a short amount of time.

i posted a bunch of pics on my flickr page (you can just click the photo above to see them).

i did however get insanely claustrophobic going down the escalator to the train. something about being underground away from the sun and air was really turning on my anxiety issues. not fun.

but otherwise it was awesome. i loved the little boroughs and the buildings climbing ever higher on all sides. i got to shop at PurlSoho, my favorite fabric store. i also went to the Met and century 21. all in all it was inspiring and fun.

plus i got to see scott and andrea, which was awesome, if only for a few hours.

cheers!
sam